As the sort of person who is creatively inclined, I usually have a handful of artsy endeavors in process at any given time. I’ve always been prone to living in a constant state of creative mess, much to the chagrin of first my parents and now my neat & tidy husband. Even in my busiest of times, I have both projects of my own and custom projects to work on, and most of the time if I’m on the couch watching tv or a movie in the evenings, I have paper and some sort of drawing utensil in my lap.
But over the past few months, I’ve had a really rough time getting motivated, and I almost feel like I have lost some of the joy I have always found in creating. I have neglected my Etsy shop and rarely find myself actually wanting to sit down and make something, and honestly I have been pretty down about it. I feel so lazy and unproductive if I am not constantly mid-project, and I start to feel guilty neglecting my blog and Etsy shop, which is silly because nobody cares except for me, ha! Feeling like I’m in a rut usually sends me deeper into that rut, and I end up in a cycle of sulking and pity-parties.
This time around, however, I have started to see the silver lining in the grey cloud that is “artist’s block.” I’ve noticed myself being more present, both at work and in my home life. In the evenings when my husband and I typically watch one of our favorite shows and catch up on one another’s day, I am actually listening; I hear what my husband is telling me more quickly and am more invested in our conversations, and I see the storyline of a show or movie unfolding without having to look up and say “Wait, what just happened?? I missed it!” (multi-taskers of the world, I know you feel me!) When I invite friends over, I don’t ask them to “bring things to do” to have just an artsy-work day (even though I really enjoy doing that, and if you know me and would like to get together for an art day I am down!); I’ve had deeper conversations, more face-to-face time with a variety of friends, and have gotten to go out and about around our town and in the city (Philly) without the pressure of feeling like I have to stay home or holed up in a coffee shop to work on my artistic endeavors or projects. Again, those are things that I usually LOVE, but in the midst of this particular creative dry spell I have embraced just living.
And in our fast-paced world of constant information, three-page to-do lists, and an expectation to communicate in all formats at all times, sometimes living is what we need to do the most.